Rick Owens’ One Man Fight to #Freethedick

Rick Owens show AW 2015L ove him or hate him, there’s no denying that Rick Owens knows how to provoke. The American fashion designer and purveyor of the sort of clothing you might wear to a post-apocalyptic rave managed to top his Spring 2014 Ready-to-Wear show in terms of shock factor.

In September 2013, Owens stunned the audience with 40 strongly built female dancers, features set in a “grit-face” scowl, stomping and step-dancing their way down the runway, this year it’s the men who got to have their day in the sun… with some strategically placed cut-outs.

All things considered, perhaps we shouldn’t be so surprised. Cut-outs are totally “in” right now (just see Versace’s latest offerings at the Paris Haute Couture 2015 fashion shows), and frankly everything else has been done. Nipples? Yawn. Tom Ford, Erdem and Christopher Kane already did that last year. Butts? So last century! The penis is clearly the final frontier – we had an appetizer with Walter Van Beirendonck’s snakeskin penis shoes and penis hats, but now is the time for the real thing! The pièce de résistance, if you can handle it.

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s finally happened… we have entered the advent of full frontal fashion. You may laugh, but let me tell you, it takes some serious balls to rock this look. Several models strutted their stuff at the FW 2015-2016 show at Paris Fashion Week, all with the same nonchalant expression, as seemingly unbothered by their exposure as physically and psychologically possible.

“I can’t believe Rick Owens sent dudes in pee-hole ponchos down the runway,” commented one spectator, “That’s either lunacy or genius, but I don’t know which.”

The ultimate question will be whether or not real people will be prepared to heed this call to arms and join the battle for penile emancipation, I guess we’ll find out when autumn rolls around this year.

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